Bringing a foster child into a home with existing children is equal parts rewarding and equal parts worrisome. There are lots of questions that you will want the answer to in order to put your mind at rest, and the children may have some of their own to throw in as well. So, anyone in this situation may need some tips to help the transition go smoothly, and this guide has the most useful ones below.
Preparation is Key
If you are about to accept a looked after child into your house, make sure you are ready for it. You will have been through the training, met the social workers, and spent some time getting the house ready. Yet, it is always worth preparing any existing children in the home too, and this should be a central focus if you want to ensure a positive outcome. It doesn’t matter if you are fostering in Doncaster with an agency, or anywhere else in the country, there will be guidelines and stipulations to follow. These will be geared towards helping you prepare for the day they arrive at your door, and they will be helpful every step of the way.
Communication is a Powerful Tool
Utilise all the skills you have when it comes to communication. There will be a lot of conversations that lead up to the first placement, and any existing children in the home are bound to have plenty of questions. If you don’t know the answer, reassure them that you will find out whatever they want to know. Work with them and keep talking, and you will create a situation where they feel comfortable to come to you with the hard stuff too.
Don’t Force the Relationship
You should never force the relationship between your children and foster children under any circumstances. They will move at their own pace, and that is always best so everybody is comfortable.
Be Extra Vigilant During the Settling in Period
It will be your absolute priority to remain super vigilant as the looked after child is settling into your home. This is when everyone will be feeling a bit tense as they are getting used to the new routine and changed dynamic. Your job will be to carry everyone through by staying on the ball and stopping problems in their tracks.
Give Everyone Their Own Space to Breathe
Everyone needs space to breathe and somewhere that belongs to just them. Make sure that every child in your home has this and stress the importance of this being their haven. Treat it with the respect you would expect for your bedroom or study, and let them use it to regulate, relax and have alone time if they need it. This will help if there are tense days because sometimes stepping back and feeling safe is all that’s needed to move forward.
Navigating the nuances of introducing a foster child into a home with your children doesn’t have to be overwhelming. There are loads of great strategies to put in place that will make everyone feel supported and capable of handling the transition. Keep an open mind and remember that children are only human too.
